28 Jan 2010

❤ 当劈腿在爱情中发生之后，
别无选择的是：
必须积极地面对真相与耐心疗养。
幸运的是，只要我们愿意成长，
伤痕也可以是上天送给自己最好的礼物。

❤ 劈腿，常源自感情重叠期，
还没放下手中的碗，
筷子已向外伸。

❤ 愿意成全对方幸福；不见得可以容忍劈腿。

❤ 劈腿动机，形态不同，造成的伤害却一样深刻。

❤ 感情走到疲乏的阶段，
对外寻求刺激，
就像为了省几个钱才去黄昏市场，
即使看到不怎么理想的鱼，只要还算便宜，
就让人忘了对新鲜该有的挑剔。

❤ 爱情中缺乏新鲜感，劈腿成为激起火花的捷径。

❤ 劈腿，只有短暂的刺激，绝不可能有长久的真爱。

❤ 欠缺品味，才会错把腥味当成鲜味，用以刺激疲乏的食欲。

❤ 道义，
应该放在爱情前面，
这是为人处事的基本原则。
如果男女遵守道义，
就不会对女友的好友下手。

❤ 贪图方便、失去分寸，劈腿事件的第三者经常就是好友。

xoxo

劈腿类型

因为动机不同而形成的劈腿类型：

1. 《骑驴找马》型：
   最传统的是《骑驴找马》型，就是觉得目前的对象不够好，所以不放弃找到更好的对象的可能性，但对方也没有坏到需要立即甩掉，于是拖着、赖着……看看哪天有机会找到真命天子或天女，再来想办法移情别恋。而当新的对象出现，自己又不十分确定时，就会发生多脚化的情形。
   
2. 《预留备胎》型：
   跟《骑驴找马》类似，但想法是倒过来的。《预留备胎》型，是自己在这段感情中屈居劣势，于是先找个备胎，以防自己被甩时，能够立刻跳船，不至于掉落情海灭顶。当然，还有一种心态，是无关对方好坏，只因为自己欠缺安全感，就想找个备胎。
   
3. 《藕断丝连》型：
   因为旧情难忘而《藕断丝连》，明明已经展开新恋情了，也进行的很顺利，却总是和前任情人维持着若即若离的微妙关系，抱着《反正自己也没啥损失》以及《买卖不成仁义在》的心态，继续交往，游走在爱情和友情的边缘，享受近似偷情的快感。
   
4. 《多多益善》型：
   习惯招风引碟式的《多多益善》型，喜欢追求新刺激，要靠着微薄的新鲜感来保持生命的活力。无法抗拒诱惑，不能长期经营，只爱炒短线，很容易就让自己的爱情沦为多脚化。
   
5. 《填补空档》型：
   无法处理寂寞，劫机来个《填补空档》。当另一半又是必须离开一段时间，不论是出差或旅行，耐不住寂寞时，就会找个《点心》填补空档；等到另一半回来，却无法很快结束关系，而演变成三人行。

以上归纳的这些类别，是现代男女恋爱是很常见的劈腿形式，看起来林林总总，甚至情有可原，但都是基于自我意识的贪念与执著，造成对别人的伤害与损失，并不能以耻为理由，赖合理化劈腿的行为。

xoxo

《劈腿》?《养鱼》?

《劈腿》和《养鱼》，只是不同策略的多脚化经营。
《劈腿》指的是一个人已经拥有爱情之后，又开始把脚踏进另一条船，有两个以上的交往对象，而且大多会对另一半隐瞒自己多重交往的真相。
而所谓的《养鱼》，应该是在正式走进爱情的阶段之前，双方都知道彼此并非一对一交往，而是在多对象的交往中，选择一个最适合自己的人。
《劈腿》是《放》的策略；《养鱼》是《收》的策略。

xoxo

7Jan

People come into your lifefor a reason, a season or a lifetime.
When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that person.
When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed.
They have to come assist you through difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid the physically, emotionally or spiritually.
They may seem like a God send and they are.
They are there for the reason you need them to be.
Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvinient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end.
Sometimes they sie. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand.
What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done.
The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.
Some people come into your life for a SEASON,
because your turn has come to share, grow or learn.
They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh.
They may teach you something you have never done.
They usually give you an unbelievable anout of joy.
Believe it, it is real. But only for a season.
LIFETIME relationship teach you lifetime lessons, things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotinal foundation.
Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life.
It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.
Thank you for being a part of my life, whether you were a reason, a season or a lifetime.

xoxo

7 Jan 2010

As we grow up, we learn that even the one person that wasnt supposed to ever let you down probably will.
You will have heart broken probably more than once and its harder everytime. You'll break hearts too, so remember how it felt when yours was broken.
You'll fight with your best friend.
You'll blame a new love for things an old one did.
You'll cry because time is passing too fast, and you'll eventually lose someone you love.
So, take too many pictures, laught too much, and love like you've never been hurt.
Because every sixty seconds you spend upset is a minute of happiness you'll never get back.
Dont be afraid that your life will end, be afraid that it will never begin.

xoxo